The Philosophy of the Other

And so it was, one early morn, by the lush green coastal backyard, and the pale clouded sky, a discourse was begun between you and I.

One beautifully conflicting thing that stuck in my head, occurred when Jenkins and I were discussing our philosophies. I was somewhat boasting, brimming with slight content about the somewhat dynamism of my adult life. Jenkins confessed that my ways frustrated him.

I asked him to describe were we differ and he said “If this green metal pole in front of me were “it”, I grab the pole, and you barely clasp it.”

I tried not to be offended by this, as in many ways, we are indeed “poles” apart. But something began to stir, and it centred and manifested around the very word he had used; Frustrated.

It seems that my life under his lens, is far less willing to be concrete, accentuated more by the contrast of himself being an incredibly grounded individual. Hearing this for the first time in our long friendship, I thought to be bloody interesting.

When asked to explain my philosophy, I think I gave something indeed air and water-like: “I think I am becoming increasingly sceptical over anyone or anything that attempts to tell me “That’s just the way it is!””. I can see how this could be incredibly problematic for someone who likes to grasp, to grasp, and understand better why he is frustrated with how I may approach somethings.

From my lens, does my view compromise his, without his compromising mine? Or do they both equally wound each other’s? If I believe my view is “make up your own rules”, is Jenkin’s “don’t waste time speculating the rules, you’re not playing the game then”? Which view is a greater cerebral existence? Which view is right?

I would however, agree with parts of his frustration. At times I grow frustrated and confused with myself. I back myself immensely, perhaps too immensely, that at times, I can be too pre-occupied in my own world, convinced that my pole is the way, or forgetting the pole at all. Perhaps Jenkins is attempting to tell me, that I should simply grab onto a god damn pole, and that is does not necessarily have to be his pole (forgive the sexual innuendos, the minds of early morn are different to the early risen), but to grip something rather than nothing.

I would however, disagree, and argue that both a grabbing and a non-grabbing (and hence anywhere in between), approach to existence, are both equally valid. The respective owners of each approach should not let frustration become a central theme, when undertaking a comparison of the Philosophy of the Other, with a Philosophy of the Self.

Understanding, perhaps, but not frustration.

Frustration implies an inability to be a cohesive Thing, a discordance. It could be a frustration borne out of jealousy, placing a “negative” on our Self and a “positive” on the Other. Or it could be a frustration borne out of condescendence, placing the “positives” and “negatives” the other way around. It could also be a frustration occurring from re-occurring speculation, constantly placing a “?” onto themselves and they-selves; the frustration of uncertainty. You, Jenkins, may also feel a frustration in reading this.

Frustration, perhaps, but not understanding.

Understanding implies an ability to be a cohesive Thing, a harmony. It could be an understanding borne out of admiration, placing content on our Self and respect on the Other. Or it could be an understanding borne out of humbleness, expressing mutuality, recognising that there could be more than one ultimate principle. You, Jenkins, may also feel an understanding in reading this.

(Contradicting yet again, it is also possible to be a mass of beautifully conflicting frustrated things, in harmony together; an untuned guitar; the current state of global affairs.)

We perhaps are not friends because we dance together, or run together or play music together, but rather because at times we allow our thoughts to dance, run and play; at other times I will firmly be, the devil’s advocate of everything you’ll ever have to say. Your move. En Garde.

Yours truly,

The Philosophy of the Friend.